When I woke up, I was tied to a chair in a
warehouse. Or, I guess it was more a
side room off of the warehouse. It was
one of Decartes’. I could hear the
animals in the other room. I was alone.
I
tried to escape, but I think Decartes must have gotten magically enhanced rope
from Rumplestiltskin. I suppose he
offered to use me to help fund his evil plans once he gets out of prison. I was stuck.
I
have no idea how long I was left there.
It felt like hours. Eventually
the door opened, and Decartes and the Queen stepped through. For those of you who don’t know who the Queen
is, she’s a supervillain who can change her appearance at will, though usually
she’s a tall blonde with blue eyes. She
was the one at the duck pond, the one who was flirting with Decartes. If nothing else, she must have been a
brilliant actress, because it was obvious when the two of them walked in they
hated each other. They moved to polar
opposite ends of the room and glared at each other the entire time they were
there. I don’t know how they managed to
put their differences aside long enough to work together.
Decartes
didn’t waste any time. He pulled out a
gun and told me to start talking. I
didn’t want to, but what choice did I have?
I blabbered about anything I could: weather, politics, I even told them
how much I wanted to watch when Snow White and the Seven Supers kicked their
butts. As long as I kept talking they
were happy. Soon I had a pile of gems around
my chair as high as my knees, and my voice was going out. Finally they let me stop, but they were back
the next day.
By
the third day I was talking in a whisper, and I was just repeating the same
things over and over again. I was sure
my voice would go out completely in a few minutes, and I was terrified of what
they would do.
That’s
when the door blew in.
Seriously. A gust of wind strong enough to rival a
tornado, a flurry of snow, and Snow White stormed through the door
(literally). Behind her I could see
Prince Charming, Beast, Gretal, the Mermaid, and Cinderella. Snow went straight for the Queen, Charming
right beside her, and the Beast charged Decartes. The Mermaid followed him. Cinderella took something from her Charm
Bracelet, what looked like a bejeweled pair of scissors, and cut through the
ropes. After the others had subdued the
villains, Gretal temporarily paralyzed their powers. I nearly asked if she could do the same for
me, but I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to make a sound.
I
tried to stand, but my knees were a little wobbly. Charming ended up supporting me on the way
out. They had a helicopter waiting
outside. They were all very gentle, of
course. Snow White especially. I almost felt like I knew her somehow. They took me to a secret wing of the hospital. Apparently they have a wing for supers, so
the civilians don’t find out who they are.
I was only there for about half an hour.
The doctors gave me a few prescriptions to help my throat heal, and then
Snow and Charming took me home. I don’t
know how they knew where I live, but I suppose whatever hacker they have on
their team did their homework.
I
wanted to sleep, but I ended up staying awake for most of the night. When I finally fell asleep I had nightmares I
was back in Decartes’ warehouse, and when I woke up, Ivy and Ceci were
there. When they heard the news they’d
come back to find me. I feel so bad that
I cut their honeymoons short.
They
had to leave eventually, of course, but first Ivy gave me a new phone. It has an app that supposedly records a
conversation and puts it straight into my blog.
I assume she thought it would be helpful if I was ever kidnapped
again. I suppose I could test it now.
“Testing… testing… hey cool, it wor-“
BANG “Hello!”
“WAAAUUUGGGGHHH!!!!” Crash,
thump “Who are you?!”
“It’s me, it’s… aaahhhhh….”
“… What are you doing?”
“Are you… wearing citrus…
aaaaaahhhh… hand lotion?”
“… Yeeees…”
“Oh, that… explains… ACHOOO!!”
CRASH
“Did your sneeze just cause that
lightening?!”
Sniff “Yep!”
“… Iris?”
Not all that glitters is gold.
Ruby
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